Thought for the Day 11/11/2022

 Friday Tale - Own Your Scars 

The    young man was still not married, and not so young anymore. He would be set up with one girl after another. But after the first date, girls just didn’t want to see him again. They didn’t tell him why, but the large scar on his cheek was just hard to look at. He knew this. He felt short-changed sometimes. After all, he really was an amazing fellow, with a big heart and sterling character.

           So he went to visit the great sage, Rabbi Chaim Kanievsky. “Rabbi,” he says tearfully, “I don’t know what to do. I don’t want to be lonely. I want to be a husband, and a father.” And he told him that he is certain that his physical appearance is the problem. That scar…

           The Rabbi suggested to him softly, “the next time you meet a girl, bring up your scar in conversation! Tell her about it, how you got it, how it makes you feel.” Own it, speak of it with confidence, and without shame, the Rabbi was telling him. An interesting idea, to which the fellow, though taken aback, committed himself.

           A couple of months later someone suggests that he meet a girl. She is described to him as very special, outgoing, and vibrant, a kind and sweet person. But what worried him was that they also told him that she was exceptionally beautiful. This worried him. “If she is as attractive as people said, then she will not be interested in a damaged person like me.” Can you imagine his pain? He comforted himself: “People exaggerate; perhaps she is average!” So he took her out.

           She was gorgeous. Oh well.

           And then they started talking. She was charming, sweet, and open. And though he would have preferred to do just about anything else in the world, he awkwardly burst out with, “I am sure that the first thing you noticed about me was this horrible scar that I have on my cheek. Rabbi Kanievsky told me to share the story about this scar on the very first date. Will you listen to my story?”

           He went on to tell her that when he was 20 years old, he was heading home from yeshiva one night, and the streets were dark and deserted. Suddenly, he heard a cry. A young girl, screaming! He saw a man running after the young Jewish girl as she was fleeing and crying out in fear. Without thinking, he immediately gave chase, and with a pounding heart, he actually caught the predator, and held him down long enough for the girl to escape. But in the struggle the man took out a knife — and though he survived, his face never would look the same.

           “That is the story of my scar.”

           She was shuddering, wiping tears from her eyes. He was surprised at the strength of her emotions, until she said to him, “I never thought that I would find you. Since that day, I have wondered who had heroically saved me? Is he okay? I wish I knew his name. Will I ever have the opportunity to thank him?”

           Today, they are happily married.

 Own your scars. They are your greatest strengths. They are a constant reminder of who you truly are, how much you’ve grown, and what you’re striving for.
~ Rabbi Shmuel Reichman

They were stoned, sawn in two, tempted, put to death with the sword, they went about in sheepskins, goatskins, being destitute, afflicted, ill-treated.  And all these having gained approval through their faith, did not yet receive what was promised, because God has provided something better for us, so that apart from us they would not be made perfect. ~ Hebrews 11:37-40